Deployment

Daddy snuggles :)

 As you all know from facebook, Brandon left for his deployment yesterday. It was a sad day. The longest time we have spend apart is 6 weeks at a time, so 6 months is a big difference. It is nice to have school and Audrey to keep me busy though.

We waited at the terminal for about 4 hours before they called Brandon's flight for boarding. We got to sit with him the whole time, so that was a big plus. Sitting there waiting was the worst part....knowing that the goodbyes were coming. Brandon hides his emotions very well...he knew how sad I was and breaking down would make it worse. Bless his heart, he is a great fella ;)

I <3 my airman

This is how I try to look at the time apart. There is no sense in pouting about it. Deployment comes with the territory. We knew it was coming and prepared as much as you can for something like this. Complaining about the situation is not going to make it better, in fact it will only make me miserable. It could always be worse! The air force is relatively safe and it is only 6 months. It could be much longer. SO, I plan to make the most out of this time and be as positive as I can. It is selfish of me to whine and complain when Brandon is the one sacrificing so much.

I have a few goals that I plan to work on while he is gone....

1) Get in awesome shape so we can compete in Tough Mudder in May
2)Get our home decorated how I want it....been slacking since we moved while I was very pregnant.
3) Get rid of the excess. Our storage room in the basement of our building is FULL of crap. Time to get rid of the stuff we aren't using and get organized.

But for now, I am allowing myself ONE day of full out lazy complete with ice-cream in bed :)

Month 2

Audrey is 2 months old today! 

These past 2 months have seriously flown by. Audrey is changing so much! It is so fun to watch her grow and do new things.

Audrey's second month has definitely been much smoother than her first month. She is on a pretty set schedule now. She goes down for bed at 9:30 and wakes up between 3-4 am to eat. After she eats she goes back down until about 7:30 then is up to eat again. After she eats, she goes back to sleep. If I am feeling lazy then I will go back to sleep as well, but usually I get up and use this time to work out and get things done around the house. She is up again around 10 and that is when she takes a bath and gets dressed. From about 11-6 she takes a couple short naps and plays and eats in between. Around 6 she wakes up for a couple hours, eats, plays, then back down for bedtime! This schedule works great for the both of us and is much better than the erratic schedule she was on the first month!

Audrey has started interacting much more and has become more vocal. She makes such cute baby noises :) She also smiles and giggles quite often! I like to think that she recognizes Brandon and I but I am not so sure. We had her 2 month wellness check today and she is very healthy! Woo! She had her 2 month shots and though she has long forgotten about them, I still feel so sad for her! Ridiculous, yes. Brandon had a PT test so I had to go by myself....never again! She had just woken up from a nap so she was smiling and giggling at the nurse, then BAM. Poor baby was so unsuspecting. Her arms flew out and she looked at me like "WHYYY!!!" then just screamed like I never heard her scream before. It was so heartbreaking. She has been very sleepy since then.

 
STATS:
10.5 lbs
21 inches
Size 1 diapers
Some newborn clothes still, but pants are too short, starting to wear mostly 0-3 months
Eating 4-5 oz every 3-4 hours

Hanging out after her doctors appointment. She wouldn't let me put her tights back on.

Still smilin!

Month 1

1 month old!!

Audrey turned 1 month on September 3rd! This was a special day because it was also her Daddy's 24th birthday :) So of course we had to make him a birthday sticker too!

Our first month with our little princess was very exciting! It was also very hectic. Anyone that is familiar with the military knows that nothing is a simple process. We were given a packet telling us what to do, but of course it was missing half of the stuff. It was quite the process, but about 5 weeks after she was born was had her enrolled in DEERS and Tricare, had her command sponsored and her passport/social security card/birth certificate applications done!

As you know from my previous post, we had a hard time from the get-go with breastfeeding. After many emotionally charged, failed attempts at nursing I ended up having to pump and bottle feed. This was emotionally and physically draining. Everytime she wanted to eat I had to feed her, then pump. I was spending hours a day pumping. It was terrible and I was exhausted. I also had the baby blues and it was a terrible combination. I battled with wanting to quit and feelings of guilt. After a little over 4 weeks, I had to give up. I just could not do it anymore. I felt like I had failed. We switched Audrey to formula and she is doing just fine! Breastfeeding just is not for everyone and I am not a bad mother for not doing it longer. It took a while for me to get over my feelings of guilt. Doctors here make you feel so guilty for not breastfeeding, HEY GUYS my baby is just fine! Not only has my life gotten much easier, my baby is much happier because I am not so stinking stressed! Rant over.

We took Audrey for a spinal ultrasound to check out her sacral dimples. They needed to see if they were tethered or something. I don't really understand...but they are normal! They are just cute little dimples and nothing to fret :) She was also jaundice for a couple days but after a bit of sunlight she was fine.

Like I said earlier, I battled with the baby blues for a couple weeks. I was completely fine one minute, then bawling the next. I am sure my husband thought I was crazy. One day we were lounging on the couch and out of nowhere I looked over at him and said, "I think I am going to cry now." Then I just started bawling. Rather than make me feel like a nut job he just came over to me and hugged me until I was done crying. He truly is a wonderful husband, how did I get so lucky? My doctor also warned him that I could be weepy for a while, so he was prepared for it. I think I would have been fine if I had my family there. I was just so incredibly sad for really no reason. I felt so guilty for being sad because I was supposed to be so happy right? I was really nervous that I was going to get postpartum depression with Brandon deploying...but luckily the baby blues slowly faded. One day I just felt a sense of relief, like everything was going to be just fine....and it is :)

Audrey's developments:

1-She weighed 6.7 lbs when we left the hospital and at 4 weeks she was up to 8.11 lbs
2-She wore newborn size clothes and diapers the whole first month
3-She learned how to smile and giggle around 4 weeks old!
4-She could life her head up off my chest and hold it for several seconds...pretty wobbly though!
5-At 4 weeks old she took her first trip away from the area we live in! We went to Spangdahlem AB for a softball tournament and she slept the whole time.

Woo! I am caught up. Since we are almost at the two month mark this post is a little jumbled because everything is blending together...everything has been such a whirlwind! The Month 2 post will be better organized hopefully! :) And some pictures of her first month.....

She is so stinking cute!

First bath at home!

She was jaundice in this pic, you can tell in her face.

LOL love her!

I wanted to track her growth the first couple weeks until I could start using the monthly stickers! This was my stuffed animal I have had since I was 6! Now it is Audrey's turn to love him :)

Audrey Part Deux

Hello again! I intended to get up to date with the blog much quicker than I actually am. Saturday we were in Trier all day and I spent the majority of Sunday being a total bum. I ate like total crap this weekend so that contributed to the laziness on Sunday. I still managed to lose two pounds though, holla! Anywho, lets pick up where we left off....

After the C-section I was taken back into the L&D room where I waited to be transported to the Mother/Baby ward. I couldn't leave L&D until I could feel my legs, which took a little while. I hardly remember the time period after the surgery while I waited to be transported. It was all such a whirlwind. Doctors and nurses were in an out checking on Audrey and I. I tried nursing her but she wouldn't latch on. The nurses said that is pretty normal for c-section babies so I wasn't concerned. I wasn't in any pain either, just itchy beyond belief! I was itchy everywhere but it was the worst right above my lip. So weird! A friend of mine told me the same thing happened to her so it must be normal. All I wanted to do was hold my baby and call my family. Both were nearly impossible. We had too much traffic in the room to even think about calling family and the doctors kept taking Audrey. Apparently she needs bathed after sitting in a hot tub for 10 months ;) A pediatrician also came in and looked her over to make sure everything was okay. He noticed two small dimples at the top of her bum (they are so cute!) that he was concerned about it. They are called sacral dimples and can cause problems later on in life. You would think I would be panicked, but I was so drugged up it hardly phased me. (more on that later..)

After her first bath :)

Fast forward to when we finally got down to Mother/Baby ward. The hospital stay really wasn't too bad, but I know I would have enjoyed it much more if 1) my family was here 2) I wasn't breastfeeding. Breastfeeding was a complete nightmare! She would NOT latch and she cried and cried when we tried. The nurses were helpful, but it just was not working. We even had a lactation consultant come in and she was awful! She was very forceful and Audrey and I were both bawling and she did not let up. I was in so much pain and this lady was jerking me and the baby around trying to get her to latch. I was a wreck, I felt so guilty because she was hungry and I could not feed her. I ended up having to pump and feed her with a little syringe. It was such a joyous time and I was miserable because I guess I just expected the breastfeeding crap to come naturally, so not the case. I also did not realize how badly I would want my family there. I wanted to share that time with them so badly. Military life has many perks, but it is so stinking hard sometimes.

I wasn't impressed with the day time nurses, but our night time nurses were fabulous. It was a younger, new girl that was still training and a big burly man-no joke. They were awesome though! They had to come in every few hours and massage my belly to make sure my uterus was going down or something weird like that. Needless to say, this was excruciating. I was on painkillers but it did not help. In walks this big, buff man with giant hands saying, "I have to massage your belly." Talk about terrifying. Turns out he was so much more gentle than the women nurses!He was Brandon and I's favorite nurse.

Hanging out at the hospital

It was painful to get up so I did not change one diaper until we got home from the hospital. Brandon was so incredible with her. He was very attentive to both of us and I am so grateful for that. He was at my side helping me get up, getting me things, asking if I needed anything. The first night he even slept on the cold hospital floor because he didn't know the chair folded out into a bed LOL Poor guy.

I only stayed in the hospital for 48 hours. The doctor suggested staying another night, but said there was no medical reason that they could not discharge me, so they left it up to me. I chose to go home even though I really should have stayed. I just wanted to get into my own bed. Did I mention I couldn't shower for 2 days because of my stitches? I was so disgusting. Once we finally got the discharge papers and my brown paper bag full of pills (seriously, a bag full of them) we high tailed it out of there. I could not wait to get home. I was expecting to get a wheelchair and have a nurse wheel me out or something, hey I just had major abdominal surgery. Nope. Mother/Baby ward is on the second floor and I had to just walk my hobblin butt outta there. I couldn't even stand up straight! It took a solid 30 minutes with several breaks. That's a military hospital for ya. I was discharged and not their problem anymore. The drive home was pretty miserable because military bases love speed bumps. These are not just little speed bumps, they are the kind that you need to make a complete stop to cross. I am NOT exaggerating. Percocet was my best friend for about a week. Oh well, I survived ;)

Getting ready to go home! She wasn't thrilled.

First car ride!

Home and snuggling Daddy :)

From here on out I plan to do a post on Audrey monthly so I can share her monthly photos and updates. Of course I will post in between as well because I am basically obsessed with this baby.

Thanks for reading yall!